Effective communication is important, especially on important topics when people disagree. Think of your previous arguments about sensitive subjects like religion, politics, gun rights and even contract negotiations. In these cases, the conversation can become heated and deteriorate quickly.
When engaging in these types of conversations, do so with an open mind. You may not have all the answers and your position may not be the best one. Do not try to convince the other person to change their mind in one conversation. As the various points of view are discussed, some will resonate more than others. When done well, the parties will come to an agreement.
According to Patrick Bet-David’s , there are certain phrases which help everyone navigate tense conversations, avoid heated arguments and create an atmosphere conducive to change.
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Be the last to talk and listen intently. Let the other person fully explain their position before you express your opinions.
To fully understand the other person’s perspective, ask them to “unpack†it for you. The word “unpack†usually triggers the other person to explain their thought process in logical order and with less emotion.
Once you have a full understanding of the other persons perspective, it helps to summarize everything. “Can we review this together?†is a great option to start that conversation. After the summary, if you are certain their position is wrong, you can begin the process of presenting your arguments.
Start by saying, “Can we continue this conversation later? I’d like to do a bit of research on what you have shared with me.†This allows you time to prepare your arguments based on all the information they have. When you present your opinions, you must do it effectively.
In next week’s Biz Tip article, we will discuss effective ways of presenting your position.
Bill Nordbrock
Bill Nordbrock is vice president of community relations for SCORE Southern ÃÛèÖÖ±²¥, a nonprofit that offers free small-business counseling. For more information, go to , send an email to mentoring@scoresouthernaz.org or call 505-3636.
